I just spent the most relaxing weekend with my in-laws! We drove up to Arlington Friday night and left Sunday afternoon. I was so peaceful and relaxing. And when Felipe and I got back to our apartment we folded clothes while we watched The Office. AND THEN Felipe set up a wonderful weekend get-away at Christmastime! We get to go see one of my favorite groups perform and then stay at the nicest hotel I've ever stayed in.
I'm so tired of being a teacher. You hear bad reports about teachers in the news sometimes, and I just know that the kids had it coming. They are not good people. They make me cry so much. I'm ready to quit. I'm going to start taking my personal things out of the room tomorrow morning.
This phrase essentially means "good luck". People will buy an idol of Buddha and whenever they need or want something they rub his belly so all their dreams will come true. Somehow this is supposed to transfer good luck onto the person rubbing when really it only transfers the germs of the last persons who rubbed the belly.
I have some friends praying for me. This update is for them.
Being pregnant doesn't help with teaching at all. This morning I was ready to quit because I was so sick of all the kids and their bad attitudes etc. But by this afternoon I was feeling so much better! So I didn't quit my job.
I had a good meeting with my principal about grading policies and I feel very enthusiastic about teaching now. I think I'll wake up tomorrow feeling (mentally) very good...physically I might not be feeling that good though.
Recently I have had various degrees of morning sickness. It's been getting better though. I enjoy, however, being able to be joyful despite the nausea. This nausea is because God found pleasure in allowing my husband and I to conceive when so many of our friends are having difficulty in this area. I am especially grateful to even have a wonderful husband who loves me and is excited to have a baby. How many people don't even have this much? But God has been gracious and merciful to me. Even above all of this he has provided me with a job. So if I complain about my high school freshmen not knowing 8th grade math, at least I have a job. And it's a good job too!
My husband and I are expecting our first child in mid-May. We are so excited!
]]>I love the school where I teach. I love the subject that I teach. I love the town where I live and teach. I love my fellow teachers and administration...but its more difficult to have a good day when I can't get to my classroom before the kids to pray for them, the class, the day, myself and my teaching. I need to be able to read my Bible and meditate in soothing lights and music before students start entering my room. If school starts at 8:15 and kids are allowed in at 8:10 I have to be in my room by 7:30 and I'd prefer to be in there earlier. I need to prepare mentally before I can handle the day...I didn't have that today.
But yesterday before school I prayed that I would have a good and peaceful day but that if God wanted me to have a rough day I would be thankful for that too because I know that God doesn't allow things to happen without reason even if that reason is a simple refinement of my spirit for the glory of God, so be it. So yesterday was good. Today was rough. And I'm thankful. Even if the rest of the year is rough, I praise God that he would consider me worthy of such a trial.
Now I need to go take a couple ibuprofen...
A friend quoted this on facebook:
"For better or for worse refers to what life throws at you, not what the wrong person decides to put you through. What life throws at you includes fire, flood, famine, the birth of a handicapped child, cancer, the loss of a job… It does not include being mistreated on purpose by someone who is supposed to be in love with you.
Your husband is having his life the way he chooses to have it. Are you not entitled to the same? Marriage is supposed to be an enhancement to your life. It is for two people who love, trust, care for, and respect one another. It is for two who want to share all their days together."
Wayne & Tamara
(From the column for the week of May 13, 2002)wayneandtamara.com
This was my response (although here I edited for a grammar error):
We didn't use those words in our vows. Instead we hoped to proclaim the glory of God's love by trying to emulate it. Felipe said, "..For God’s perfect love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. According to the grace of God, I promise to endeavor to show to you the same kind of love as Christ showed the Church when He died for her.." And in my response I said, "..as the Church is called to follow Christ I vow to follow you...Together I hope to model the love God has for his children when he sent his son to save us and draw us back to his loving embrace.." What we chose for our marriage was not to stick with each other through "good and bad" but to show each other the kind of love that Christ showed - unconditional. That means I love you no matter what comes our way, no matter what you do or say, even if you don't love me any more; I love God and that overrides my feelings and emotions. I love you period even if that means it's out of sheer obedience sometimes. By loving as Christ loves we mean specifically that we were wickedly sinning against God and hateful but he chose to sacrifice himself and win us back. Felipe is called to be like Christ in our marriage. And the Church is called to follow Christ and be like him. So now Felipe and I both love each other even when the other isn't being loving. We don't give 50/50. Because sometimes I only have 30% to give. Instead we give 100/100 because now when I only have 30% he's got us covered, and when he only has 40%, I've got his back too.
If you mean "for better or worse" then that's your vow and stick to it. As Christians, Felipe and I took it further and deeper than that in an attempt to bring Christ glory.
]]>During the first couple of weeks of marriage, neither Felipe nor I had much to do and thus had plenty of time to spend with each other. Now that we are both at various jobs from 9-6 (me from 9-4 and he from 8-10, 1-6) we have to be much more purposeful in spending time together. If we spend two evenings in a row with a group or another couple this takes away time with each other and makes me feel like I haven't seen him in forever.
The reason I mention this is because of the time I spend with someone I love even more, the man who saved my soul from an eternity of anguish, Jesus. If I find time with Felipe to be going shallow, can you imagine what my walk with Christ has been like recently? Well, I think he brought it to my attention rather quickly. Or maybe it was just that going a couple of evenings sharing our time with a group or another couple or even Felipe has made me feel like I haven't seen him in forever.
In this regard, being married is difficult. My time is vary much divided. I Corinthians 7:33-34: 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. I have friends who want to spend time with me. Friends tell me how they don't miss their husband if he was gone a week. Friends tell me how they need "alone" time. Single friends say how they miss me and some (not all) seem to not understand the new priorities in my life (on this point I have to mention that before I was married I did not understand the new priorities of my newly married friends. I respected it but did not understand.). I mention this to display how my time is divided not to comment on my friends time management.
Time is first given to God and my husband. Time then goes to work and sleep. Is there time left over? Saturday is the Sabbath. That leaves Sunday and maybe once a week for ALL friends and other family, unless they want to come to my work place and have lunch with me. I'm having a "party" for several friends to come over all together one Sunday.
Time has just become much more precious to me. Everything is scheduled. I need to get this schedule together before kids come along and my time is divided even more. Although once I have kids, work will be dropped off the schedule probably.
So be purposeful with your time. Spend time with God on purpose. Spend time with your friends on purpose. Spend time with your spouse on purpose.
This is a letter I received in response to asking my friends' mom her secret in raising her sons. I thought she had a lot of good insight that I would share here. I leave it completely unedited.
Dear Lauren,
I assume that you got married and in the transition to this new life. Congratulations. I pray that you both have some supportive mentors and people to model the kind of marriage that you desire.
I would say an outline of being a parent/key phrases would be: All this applies to marriage also!
Seek to walk with God and obey him yourself individually and in your marriage, fitting in with your husband’s plans
Walk by faith in parenting, not by fear- as in all areas of life.
Obeying God to the best of your ability and leaving the results to God
Seek to apply the Bible to your life and family
Get around successful models of marriage and family and be teachable, get help, ask questions,
Read, learn, adjust, try different things, take action if things are going badly. For example, twice I pulled one or more of our sons out of school situations where it was not going well, and home schooled for a season and moved to other school
View parenting as an entrustment of lives from God, a responsibility
Then later as they become adults we must let them go.
Realize no parents are perfect, and admit mistakes to your children- keep and clear relationship with them as possible.
Have a united face as a couple to your children.
Take active role in getting your children around other positive role models, adults and children.
Parenting is a multifaceted gem that is never done being cut or polished.
Summary:
Love, relationship, modeling what you want to see in them, being part of a church family where they see and learn models of Christian behavior
Patterns I have observed:
Mission trips take them outside their normal selfish lives and can be life changing.
I have seen a lot better success rate (Children growing up to be good members of society, workers for God’s Kingdom and in good relationship with their parents and
not addicted to harmful behaviors)” in my friends who home schooled or Christian schooled their children rather than public school. I am talking percentages here, not absolutes . there are “failures “ with any system but seem much more common in public schools where there was little Christian friend support or strong youth groups. The negative influences are so strong in some high schools.
You have the opportunity to impact the world for good through discipling your children, multiplying any impact you could make alone. May God bless you in your new marriage.
Love, to you! diane